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Thursday, April 29, 2010

Tour de Germany



Did you know that Volkswagen's "focus on mobility" extends beyond cars to two-wheelers? Neither did we until VW research and development chief Dr. Ulrich Hackenberg said so at this week's Auto China 2010 show. Hackenberg introduced the VW bik.e, a battery-powered two-wheeler that resembles a bicycle without the pedals.
According to Autobloggreen, the specs look pretty good: a 12.5 mile range (perfect for short trips around town, nothing more), a top speed of 12.5 mph, and most impressively, the bike can easily fold into a disc that fits in a car's spare tire compartment.
VW hasn't revealed when--or if--the concept bike will go on sale, but chances are good that it will be commercialized at some point soon. What do you think--would you ride around on such a tiny contraption? Video of the bike in action is below. Just skip past the part with the goofy undersea dancers.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Bob, The Hoods, and Bill

Had a great ride on Sunday.  The usual groundhog parcours.  John and Camille Hood were in town visiting from Franklin, NC.  We picked them up on Winner-Foster and they rode with our group through Fulshear and Simonton and back to Winner-Foster.   Really nice to ride with them again.  John half wheeling me all the way from Simonton to our turn off onto Pool Hill road - speed increasing all the way.  Just like his Dad, it is in his blood.

Not far past the turn off of Winner-Foster heading North onto FM 359 we ran into Bob Parnell and Xena riding south.  Bob is a Houston cycling legend. The Natural - natural ability to ride the bike.  They turned around and road the last 10 miles or so with us back to Katy.  Bob was diagnosed with brain cancer around a year and one half ago.  Has had surgery to remove the brain tumor, initially looked like it was staying away, but it came back.  Underwent experimental chemo treatment, but, he is losing the battle.  It turns out it was his birthday and a bunch of people came to his house on Saturday and he loved it.  He said it was the best birthday ever and that he was so "amped up" he couldn't go to sleep for quite awhile.  He pulled out his Calfee and donned an Al Wahley world championship jersey, that Al had signed and given to him, and went for a ride - first time in quite a while and maybe the last.  His muscles have atrophied and he has lost a lot of weight.  It was really nice to see him.  Bob is/was one of the good guys of the west Houston peloton.  He lived for the Kirkwood Ride/race.  Always working on the front of the pack, or off the front in a breakaway.  Yet, for such a clique-ish bunch of elite cyclist, and Bob being one of the best, he was always the kind of guy to provide encouraging words and support to the new guys/outsiders such as me 20 years ago.

Bill Edwards, another, older, cycling legend from Houston passed away yesterday after a long bout with cancer.  Bill spent a lot of his time training and coaching young riders using a classic training method emphasizing an intensity building pyramid method.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

La Doyenne

Liège-Bastogne-Liège, the last of the Spring Classics.  258 km - the oldest and toughest of the spring classics.  The famous Côte de la Redoute (8.4%) and the final Côte Saint-Nicholas (11%) are leg breakers and should produce the final selection.

I was very surprised that Cadel Evans was able to go around Alberto Contador on the Mur de Huy at Fleche-Wallonne.  Although that clearly says that Cadel is in exceptional form (and that Contador went too soon), I am suspecting that Schleck brothers may have another one-two punch up their sleeve today.  If not, Phillipe Gilbert was in sparkling good form winning the Amstel Gold race two weeks ago.

I'm going with Andy Schleck to repeat last years win.

Friday, April 23, 2010

My Generation

Ladies and Gentlemen:
WES has been gallantly carrying the weight of the Blog on his shoulders and in an effort to maintain the Friday evening music interlude I offer classics from our Generation, inspired from my viewing of Pirate Radio tonight.
Rock and Roll my friends.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_81PchgI7A&feature=channel

Transocean Horizon

Fifth generation drilling rig designed for ultra-deep water built in 2001...




This is an exploration drilling rig.  I don't do these, although this was a good rig.

The media does not understand that this platform is not intended to produce oil and gas, but, to explore for oil and gas.

When drilling a well in a new location, there is uncertainty as to the pressure regime that will be encountered.  Basically, the pressure gradient is equal to the density of water/unit depth.  However, when encountering hydrocarbon bearing sands, there is typically an over pressured zone.  This over pressured zone has to be counter-balance with the density of the drilling fluid/mud, which is controlled by the rig operators.

Sounds like they ran into a fault while drilling a wildcat exploration well and they had "lost circulation" - that means the mud that is used to balance the pressure in the hole that they are drilling was not circulating back to the rig, but was "lost" into the fault.  Eventually, if they cannot plug the well, they loose all of their mud down the fault and if the seafloor BOP (blow out preventer - multiple remotely operated valves that can shut off the well bore at the seafloor) also fails, then the unbalanced well blows out sending hydrocarbons up the drilling riser and on to the rig floor and catches fire with a big boom.  You know, like the old school pictures of Teapot Dome and other classic movies, only not with the romanticized benign rain of oil, but, with an explosion and fire.



I would be surprised if the missing crew members are alive, that was a big explosion and fire.



Not good for the people.  Not good for the industry.  Not good for the politics.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Dwarf Date Palms

I had these beautiful dwarf date palms at the head of the pool.  Gorgeous!

Planted in 2005-

















Most winters there is a mild freeze and they would loose some fronds, but they would grow back nicely in the early spring.

...looking for the picture to insert here...


Well, this past winter was really extra cold for H-town.  Not only did they loose their fronds, they outright died.

Three phallus attest  -

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Play it again Sam - Ode to Bogie

Last week in my commentary regarding the Amstel Gold race, I mentioned that the 2004 finish had Michael Boogerd, probably the most popular Dutch cyclist at the time, in the biggest race in Holland, just beat out by a nose.  He started his sprint up the Cauberg ever so slightly too soon.

I was so jazzed by the finish that I wrote a poem about it and sent it to Job.  I said if I could find the old email I would post it.  Well that was not so easy since my email archive only went back to July of 2004, but I found it anyway.


-----Original Message-----
From: Wes Schott International
Sent: Sunday, April 18, 2004 7:04 PM
To: Job Baar (BMCi); Bultema Marine
Subject: Play it again Sam - Ode to Bogie

Oh Michael, Oh Michael, how could you loose. 
You’ve disappointed 30 million pretty wood shoes.
Oh Michael, Oh Michael, it was so very close,
If you waited a meter you’d have won by a nose
Now The Caupberg she is a stubborn steep climb – one you’ve conquered at least a hundred times
Was it your ego or your athletic adrenalin high? - That let you believe your jump was not too far to die
So, Oh Michael, Oh Michael how could you loose. 
We love you, we love you, we really still do - all of us Dutchman with two wooden shoes


Wes Schott
W e s   S c h o t t   I n t e r n a t i o n a l
c o n s u l t i n g    o c e a n   e n g i n e e r
USA 281 704 2103



(15 MM Dutch = 30 MM shoes)

Since we are past the 48 hour Hanks news blackout period, I can say that Phillipe Gilbert had some great legs and hammered everybody on the Cauberg taking a great win for himself and the pride of Belgium - another true strong man of the Spring.

Flèche Wallonne - 74th edition

Tomorrow, is the mid-week classic Fleche-Wallonne.  There are many short steep climbs along the 198 km parcours typically found in the Ardennes.  But it is the famous climb in the town of Huy - the Mur de Huy that will separate the men from the boys.  They will ride up the Mur de Huy three times, the second to last time is now only 30 kms from the finish, which, of course, is also at the top of the Mur de Huy.  So, a major selection can be anticipated on the second time over the top with a leg burning slo-mo drag race up to the finish for the select few.



This Mur (wall) is 1300 m in length with an elevation change of 128 m.  The average gradient is 9.3% with the steepest section at 17%!




Le Mur de Huy from Harm Job on Vimeo.



This year, Alberto Contador will be riding Fleche-Wallonne.  He traveled by car some 20 hours with his teammates to get there - the volcano has disrupted air travel in euroland.  With Contador's explosive climbing style and highly successful spring campaign, he may just be the man to beat.  I don't think he came here to loose as he appears to want to stamp his imprimatur on this season ahead of the July showdown with Lance Armstrong.

LA won Fleche in 1996.

This race is a prelude to the second of the Ardennes week races - the famous classic Liege-Bastogne-Liege on Sunday.  More on that later in the week.

BTW - as I am sure everybody knows ;-) - the race can be watched live right on your computer screen on www.cylcing.tv

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Pimpin'

Alex has a new pet, Pimpin' the rooster.  Don't know about that color - looks purplish to me.



























Gabby Dog - one bite.

Almost got it yesterday.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Mellow Friday Night Jazz

Enjoy Pat Metheny

Amstel Gold

Job sent over these pictures of the volcano eruption in Iceland...






























...and the resultant effect on air travel to and from europa...

















Then Job, Johan, Estrogan and I had lunch today.  Johan had flown back from Holland this past Wednesday just ahead of the eruption.  Job's daughter Miriam, who was scheduled to fly from AMS to IAH tomorrow is now delayed for a few days.  Estragon was supposed to fly to Singapore tomorrow via Moscow, and that flight was cancelled.

And, then...the Dutch boys tell me that the Amstel Gold classic was cancelled, they read it in the Dutch news.

I am not so sure it is cancelled.  Nothing on the Cycling web sites that I found.  Besides, most of the riders should already be in Europe.  Now, they may have to drive or take the train instead of flying.  The team cars and the Mavic support cars and motorbikes have to drive anyway.

CyclingNews seemed to confirm this scenario - http://www.cyclingnews.com/news/amstel-versus-volcano-eyjafjallajokull

Until I get confirmation of a cancelation, I am holding out hope for a race on Sunday.
















This Sunday’s race features 31 climbs in its 257.3km and ends atop the last of them, the infamous Cauberg, where tens of thousands of Dutch bike-racing fans give the little town of Valkenburg the look of a world road championship every April.

Tea Party

Interesting NYT/CBS poll -

85% of Tea Partiers think they represent most Americans although only 25% of All Respondents (including the Tea Partiers) think that the Tea Partiers represent most Americans.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/15/us/politics/15poll.html

For me, any group that has Sarah Palin as their titular head....little more needs to be said...57% of Tea Partiers think W was a great president...no more needs to be said...

Is the following any surprise then?


At Tea Party Rallies, a Fox News Presence
More than any other major news outlet, the Fox News Channel has aligned itself with the Tea Party movement.
On Thursday, the movement was back in the news as rallies that coincided with the April 15 deadline for filing income tax forms took place across the country. Other cable news channels have reporters at the rallies, but only Fox has sent two of its biggest stars to be the hosts of hour-long programs from the event sites.
Neil Cavuto, the 4 p.m. host on Fox News and an executive at the sister network Fox Business, is in Atlanta for a rally there, and Sean Hannity, the 9 p.m. host on Fox News, is in Cincinnati for a rally and a signing of his best-selling book.
In both cases, local organizers are promoting the Fox’s presence at the rallies. In Cincinnati, seats beside Mr. Hannity’s stage were sold for $20 to $100. The money is to go to a group called the Cincinnati Tea Party.
For more than a year Fox has faced accusations that it is promoting the Tea Party movement. On April 15 last year, four of Fox’s programs were broadcast from protest sites, and the Fox host Glenn Beck said that viewers could “celebrate with Fox News” by attending or tuning in. That month the liberal media watchdog Media Matters published a number of examples of what it called promotion of the Tea Party by Fox.
Asked by Media Matters about the programming, the News Corporation chairman and chief executive Rupert Murdoch said earlier this month: “I don’t think we should be supporting the Tea Party or any other party. But I’d like to investigate what you are saying before I condemn anyone.”
The network often differentiates between its opinion shows, which feature people like Mr. Cavuto and Mr. Hannity, and its daytime news shows. Opinion shows make up the majority of Fox’s weekday schedule.
In its commercials for Mr. Cavuto’s program this week, Fox said he would be “covering” the Atlanta rally. Notably, Mr. Beck, who attended an April 15 rally in Texas last year, is not taking his show on the road this year.
Fox is clearly the favored network among supporters of the Tea Party. A New York Times-CBS News poll found that 63 percent of self-described Tea Party supporters gain most of their television news from Fox, compared to 23 percent of all Americans.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Urubu

When we were in Rio de Janeiro last summer on bidness - Gumusut model tests, I kept seeing these enormous black birds soaring at great altitude over the sea.  I was totally mesmerized by these giants of the sky.  They were abundant.  I asked numerous people what they were called and the answer I got was gaviota, which, in Spanish anyway (similar to Portuguese), means sea gull.  I said no way is that a gull, but I was told by several beach people that is what they are called, and only got a shrug of the shoulders, when I doubted that name.




I asked our driver, Leandro, what was that big bird called and I thought I finally had the answer - Urubu.  We had quite a few laughs with me mispronouncing that name.   In  any case, there was another large black bird that was extremely common down there and was flying and soaring over and around the sea in the same areas that giant bird was flying and it was the black vulture.  Finally, Leandro and I figured out that the Urubu that he has referring to was the vulture and not the bird of interest.

The way we discovered the bird to which he was referring, since he did not know the word vulture, was from an old cartoon, that he recalled and I remembered vaguely from my youth.  He said there was a pirate with the urubu on it's shoulder.  See story below.

Finally, when I got back home to Houston, I was stilled obsessed with this giant soaring black seabird.  Looking through Judy's field guides, I found it.  It was the Fregata magnificens  Magnificent Frigate bird.  Awesome creature.


7 ft wing span!

So last week at the FeatherFest in Galveston, while on the harbor boat cruise, the bird guide said that the Frigate birds where not here yet, but should be in another week or so.  Wow, I did not know they came here.  I would like to head back down to Galveston to view these magnificent birds when they return.

With all of the pelicans in Galveston, sometimes soaring much higher than I thought they flew, I was wondering if these were the Frigate bird.  But, alas, they were just high flying pelicans.  Interestingly enough the "Order" of the Frigate bird is "Pelicaniformes", so I guess it was not so bizarre of a thing to wonder.



Kingdom: Animalia
Phylum: Chordata
Class: Aves
Order: Pelecaniformes
Family: Fregatidae
Genus: Fregata
Species: F. magnificens


...and if I could ever get this view of a male in mating mode, that would be pretty cool -








Story of the Sea Hag and the Urubu -

Sea Hag - Tall, masculine looking witch featured in comics/cartoons created by Elzie Crisler Segar since the 1930s.
The Sea 
Hag - POPEYE Cartoons
The Sea Hag is the archenemy of Popeye the Sailor. Sailing the Seven Seas in her boat "The Black Barnacle," the Sea Hag plunders all in her sight.
When she set her eyes on Popeye the Sailor, she falls in love with him and does everything in her power to make him hers. Unfortunately, Popeye has a girlfriend (Olive Oyl) and besides, the stout and true Popeye would never be one to be fall for such an evil character as the Sea Hag.
Although, years later after constant pursuits and skirmishes with the Sea Hag and her minions, Popeye warms up to the mannish sea-maiden saying "I yam glad she ain't dead -- even if she is a exter bad woman -- hah! If they wasn't no bad women, maybe we wouldn't appreciate the good ones. Anyway, she yam what she yam!"
In her campaign to win Popeye's affections the lovelorn Sea Hag uses Voo Doo; kidnaps Eugene The Jeep; tries to burn Popeye's food supply of Spinach (the fumes energized him, however); transform herself into a duplicate of Olive Oyl - with no success; masqueraded as "Rose of the Sea", a beautiful young seductress; and even helped Popeye's nemesis Brutus take a youth portion to become young, fit and a suitor for Olive Oyl's affections.
The Sea Hag Captures Santa Claus
Santa Captured by The Sea Hag
The Sea Hag's "If I can't have him, no one can" attitude has driven her, on occasion, to even try to kill Popeye, as well. But romantic intentions and unrequited love aside, the Sea Hag (who just wanted to get a man to call her own), was truly a mean person. Case in point: the time she and her vulture sidekick, Bernard planned to ruin Christmas by capturing Santa Claus and burning his sack of toys. Luckily, Popeye thwarted her evil scheme.
Later in their relationship, after chasing Poyeye unsuccessfully for so many years, the Sea Hag even tried to secure the affections of Popeye's hamburger-munching pal Wimpy - again with no success. The Sea Hag's one weakness/vulnerability (besides her affection for Popeye) was the mystical powers of Eugene the Jeep, a strange creature with a bulbous nose who befriended Popeye the Sailor.
The Sea Hag Comic Strip
Comic Strip Illustration of the Sea Hag
TRIVIA NOTE: The Sea Hag character debuted on "Thimble Theater" comic strip in 1929. In 2004, actress Kathy Bates performed the voice of the Sea Hag/Siren in the first-ever Popeye the Sailor Man 3-D CGI animated production Popeye's Voyage: The Quest for Pappy. The storyline follows Popeye's journey to find his long lost father, Poopdeck Pappy, in time for the holidays. As he sails the treacherous Seas of Mystery, he encounters the villainous Sea Hag who is smitten by the hulking seaman and vows to stop at nothing until she steals him away. To imagine what the Sea Hag would look like for real, just take actor Richard Moll, put him in a body length robe, and wrap a scarf around his head.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Late-Season Hawaii | SURFER Magazine

Late-Season Hawaii | SURFER Magazine

Lunch with Job

Had a nice lunch with Job yesterday.  It is that time of year in Houston when, just for a few weeks, the weather is gorgeous.  Absolutely lovely.  We sat outside on the patio at Cafe Benedicte on Memorial just west of Eldridge Parkway and mused a bit about the ongoing interactions with people at work and in our personal lives.

Today is Judy's birthday.  I will take her to the Reef  www.reefhouston.com this evening for dinner.  We plan to meet up with Matt and Laura after dinner and have some birthday celebratory sweets.

Off for a ride shortly this morning.  Another beautiful day in the Bayou City.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Birds and Bikes

Thursday - North Deer Island by boat in Galveston Bay

Pelican
Laughing Gull
Roseate Spoonbill
Cormorant
Ibis (the cyclist friend)
Oyster Catcher
Great Blue Heron
Peregrine Falcon
and more...

Friday - Galveston Harbor by boat

Pelican - these guys are actually pretty cool
Cormorant
Laughing gull
Herring gull
Skimmers
Green Heron
Porpoise
Sea turtle
and more...

Nice Ride on Sunday, much better than that rainy, knee crunching coldish Saturday.
Atrain, Pablo, Adventure Hog, Xena, Henrich, Pasta, TD, Roberto, Scoundrel...etc...60 miles in beautiful weather  A bit of a Easterly wind made us work coming home. Legs finally starting to feel good. Now with a base to build upon, things should be looking up.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Today is the day

Paris-Roubaix

After riding away from Boonen on the Kapelmuur last week in Flanders, Cancellara has to be the favorite for today.  The strongest of the strong men last week...but the weather, the cobbles, the crashes, the tires going flat, all the obstacles that can disrupt the well made plans.  259 kms, 27 sections of cobbles, railroad crossings, lots can happen.  The weather - Clear, 10 deg C, cold NNE head wind.  This will require a strongman.  Who can challenge?  Boonen ('05, '08, '09), Flecha, O'Grady, Hincapie, Devolder? Ah yes, the greatest one day race of the year.  Enjoy!  VS - 5:00 pm CST tape delay.

Well, off for a ride - the usual ride, the same one as yesterday, last week, last month, last year...the Groundhog parcourse - we got very wet yesterday on the ride - Andy Atrain Smith pulled most of the way,  Adventure Hog Mark, Terry, Xena (Alice), Pablo, Layton, Henrik, Jimbo - we had a decent crowd at the start, which thinned out as we got wetter and wetter...what a mess, but we got in 60 miles, so that is progress, for me anyway.  Looks like no rain today with a modest SE wind.  Legs don't fail me now.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Saturday Morning Jazz

...in bed on a Saturday morning, with your woman, doing what comes naturally...

Thursday, April 8, 2010

FeatherFest

We're off to Galveston for the 8th Annual FeatherFest...

Today


Marquee Field Trip:
Exploring Pelican Island
Price: $40
Date: Thursday, April 8 / Friday, April 9
Time: 1:30 p.m. – 4:30 p.m.
Thursday Field Expert: Jim Stevenson
Friday Field Experts: Don Freiday, Dr. Dick Peake, Skip Almoney
Originally a small shifting sand bar which protected Galveston’s fledgling port, Pelican Island is now an enlarged area of maturing, vegetated dredge spoil. It provides a wide range of habitats including extensive mud flats for sandpipers, avocets, stilts, etc.; bushy areas for Neotropic songbirds, sparrows, etc.; fresh water ponds for waterfowl; and open grassy areas for prairie birds and raptors. The mud flats offer particularly good viewing at the end of the afternoon. Use of the area is not well controlled, parts of it are not too “tidy” and one road will be bumpy, but the birding is usually fine.

Tomorrow


Marquee Field Trip:
West Isle Marsh and Shorebirds
Price: $45
Date: Friday, April 9 / Saturday, April 10
Time: 7:30 a.m. – 11:30 a.m.
Field Expert: Jim Stevenson
Date: Sunday, April 11
Time: 8:00 a.m. – 12:00 Noon
Field Experts: Jim Stevenson and Don Freiday
This morning field trip is conducted by bus with frequent stops for shorebirds, waders and other surprises, all over the productive west end of Galveston Island. At least seventy species should be seen, comprised of sandpipers and some plovers, herons, egrets, ibis, spoonbills, gulls, terns, ducks and much more. In a few places, guests will pile out of the van and “scope” out large flocks.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Looting Main Street - Matt Taibbi

 Looting Main Street

How the nation's biggest banks are ripping off American cities with the same predatory deals that brought down Greece

MATT TAIBBI
Posted Mar 31, 2010 8:15 AM
If you want to know what life in the Third World is like, just ask Lisa Pack, an administrative assistant who works in the roads and transportation department in Jefferson County, Alabama. Pack got rudely introduced to life in post-crisis America last August, when word came down that she and 1,000 of her fellow public employees would have to take a little unpaid vacation for a while. The county, it turned out, was more than $5 billion in debt — meaning that courthouses, jails and sheriff's precincts had to be closed so that Wall Street banks could be paid.

As public services in and around Birmingham were stripped to the bone, Pack struggled to support her family on a weekly unemployment check of $260. Nearly a fourth of that went to pay for her health insurance, which the county no longer covered. She also fielded calls from laid-off co-workers who had it even tougher. "I'd be on the phone sometimes until two in the morning," she says. "I had to talk more than one person out of suicide. For some of the men supporting families, it was so hard — foreclosure, bankruptcy. I'd go to bed at night, and I'd be in tears."

Homes stood empty, businesses were boarded up, and parts of already-blighted Birmingham began to take on the feel of a ghost town. There were also a few bills that were unique to the area — like the $64 sewer bill that Pack and her family paid each month. "Yeah, it went up about 400 percent just over the past few years," she says.

The sewer bill, in fact, is what cost Pack and her co-workers their jobs. In 1996, the average monthly sewer bill for a family of four in Birmingham was only $14.71 — but that was before the county decided to build an elaborate new sewer system with the help of out-of-state financial wizards with names like Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers, Goldman Sachs and JP Morgan Chase. The result was a monstrous pile of borrowed money that the county used to build, in essence, the world's grandest toilet — "the Taj Mahal of sewer-treatment plants" is how one county worker put it. What happened here in Jefferson County would turn out to be the perfect metaphor for the peculiar alchemy of modern oligarchical capitalism: A mob of corrupt local officials and morally absent financiers got together to build a giant device that converted human shit into billions of dollars of profit for Wall Street — and misery for people like Lisa Pack.
And once the giant shit machine was built and the note on all that fancy construction started to come due, Wall Street came back to the local politicians and doubled down on the scam. They showed up in droves to help the poor, broke citizens of Jefferson County cut their toilet finance charges using a blizzard of incomprehensible swaps and refinance schemes — schemes that only served to postpone the repayment date a year or two while sinking the county deeper into debt. In the end, every time Jefferson County so much as breathed near one of the banks, it got charged millions in fees. There was so much money to be made bilking these dizzy Southerners that banks like JP Morgan spent millions paying middlemen who bribed — yes, that's right, bribed, criminally bribed — the county commissioners and their buddies just to keep their business. Hell, the money was so good, JP Morgan at one point even paid Goldman Sachs $3 million just to back the fuck off, so they could have the rubes of Jefferson County to fleece all for themselves.

Birmingham became the poster child for a new kind of giant-scale financial fraud, one that would threaten the financial stability not only of cities and counties all across America, but even those of entire countries like Greece. While for many Americans the financial crisis remains an abstraction, a confusing mess of complex transactions that took place on a cloud high above Manhattan sometime in the mid-2000s, in Jefferson County you can actually see the rank criminality of the crisis economy with your own eyes; the monster sticks his head all the way out of the water. Here you can see a trail that leads directly from a billion-dollar predatory swap deal cooked up at the highest levels of America's biggest banks, across a vast fruited plain of bribes and felonies — "the price of doing business," as one JP Morgan banker says on tape — all the way down to Lisa Pack's sewer bill and the mass layoffs in Birmingham.

Once you follow that trail and understand what took place in Jefferson County, there's really no room left for illusions. We live in a gangster state, and our days of laughing at other countries are over. It's our turn to get laughed at. In Birmingham, lots of people have gone to jail for the crime: More than 20 local officials and businessmen have been convicted of corruption in federal court. Last October, right around the time that Lisa Pack went back to work at reduced hours, Birmingham's mayor was convicted of fraud and money-laundering for taking bribes funneled to him by Wall Street bankers — everything from Rolex watches to Ferragamo suits to cash. But those who greenlighted the bribes and profited most from the scam remain largely untouched. "It never gets back to JP Morgan," says Pack.



If you want to get all Glenn Beck about it, you could lay the blame for this entire mess at the feet of weepy, tree-hugging environmentalists. It all started with the Cahaba River, the longest free-flowing river in the state of Alabama. The tributary, which winds its way through Birmingham before turning diagonally to empty out near Selma, is home to more types of fish per mile than any other river in America and shelters 64 rare and imperiled species of plants and animals. It's also the source of one of the worst municipal financial disasters in American history.

Back in the early 1990s, the county's sewer system was so antiquated that it was leaking raw sewage directly into the Cahaba, which also supplies the area with its drinking water. Joined by well — intentioned citizens from the Cahaba River Society, the EPA sued the county to force it to comply with the Clean Water Act. In 1996, county commissioners signed a now-infamous consent decree agreeing not just to fix the leaky pipes but to eliminate all sewer overflows — a near-impossible standard that required the county to build the most elaborate, ecofriendly, expensive sewer system in the history of the universe. It was like ordering a small town in Florida that gets a snowstorm once every five years to build a billion-dollar fleet of snowplows.
The original cost estimates for the new sewer system were as low as $250 million. But in a wondrous demonstration of the possibilities of small-town graft and contract-padding, the price tag quickly swelled to more than $3 billion. County commissioners were literally pocketing wads of cash from builders and engineers and other contractors eager to get in on the project, while the county was forced to borrow obscene sums to pay for the rapidly spiraling costs. Jefferson County, in effect, became one giant, TV-stealing, unemployed drug addict who borrowed a million dollars to buy the mother of all McMansions — and just as it did during the housing bubble, Wall Street made a business of keeping the crook in his house. As one county commissioner put it, "We're like a guy making $50,000 a year with a million-dollar mortgage."
To reassure lenders that the county would pay its mortgage, commissioners gave the finance director — an unelected official appointed by the president of the commission — the power to automatically raise sewer rates to meet payments on the debt. The move brought in billions in financing, but it also painted commissioners into a corner. If costs continued to rise — and with practically every contractor in Alabama sticking his fingers on the scale, they were rising fast — officials would be faced with automatic rate increases that would piss off their voters. (By 2003, annual interest on the sewer deal had reached $90 million.) So the commission reached out to Wall Street, looking for creative financing tools that would allow it to reduce the county's staggering debt payments.

Wall Street was happy to help. First, it employed the same trick it used to fuel the housing crisis: It switched the county from a fixed rate on the bonds it had issued to finance the sewer deal to an adjustable rate. The refinancing meant lower interest payments for a couple of years — followed by the risk of even larger payments down the road. The move enabled county commissioners to postpone the problem for an election season or two, kicking it to a group of future commissioners who would inevitably have to pay the real freight.
But then Wall Street got really creative. Having switched the county to a variable interest rate, it offered commissioners a crazy deal: For an extra fee, the banks said, we'll allow you to keep paying a fixed rate on your debt to us. In return, we'll give you a variable amount each month that you can use to pay off all that variable-rate interest you owe to bondholders.

In financial terms, this is known as a synthetic rate swap — the spidery creature you might have read about playing a role in bringing down places like Greece and Milan. On paper, it made sense: The county got the stability of a fixed rate, while paying Wall Street to assume the risk of the variable rates on its bonds. That's the synthetic part. The trouble lies in the rate swap. The deal only works if the two variable rates — the one you get from the bank, and the one you owe to bondholders — actually match. It's like gambling on the weather. If your bondholders are expecting you to pay an interest rate based on the average temperature in Alabama, you don't do a rate swap with a bank that gives you back a rate pegged to the temperature in Nome, Alaska.

Not unless you're a fucking moron. Or your banker is JP Morgan.
In a small office in a federal building in downtown Birmingham, just blocks from where civil rights demonstrators shut down the city in 1963, Assistant U.S. Attorney George Martin points out the window. He's pointing in the direction of the Tutwiler Hotel, once home to one of the grandest ballrooms in the South but now part of the Hampton Inn chain.
"It was right around the corner here, at the hotel," Martin says. "That's where they met — that's where this all started."
They means Charles LeCroy and Bill Blount, the two principals in what would become the most important of all the corruption cases in Jefferson County. LeCroy was a banker for JP Morgan, serving as managing director of the bank's southeast regional office. Blount was an Alabama wheeler-dealer with close friends on the county commission. For years, when Wall Street banks wanted to do business with municipalities, whether for bond issues or rate swaps, it was standard practice to reach out to a local sleazeball like Blount and pay him a shitload of money to help seal the deal. "Banks would pay some local consultant, and the consultant would then funnel money to the politician making the decision," says Christopher Taylor, the former head of the board that regulates municipal borrowing. Back in the 1990s, Taylor pushed through a ban on such backdoor bribery. He also passed a ban on bankers contributing directly to politicians they do business with — a move that sparked a lawsuit by one aggrieved sleazeball, who argued that halting such legalized graft violated his First Amendment rights. The name of that pissed-off banker? "It was the one and only Bill Blount," Taylor says with a laugh.

Blount is a stocky, stubby-fingered Southerner with glasses and a pale, pinched face — if Norman Rockwell had ever done a painting titled "Small-Town Accountant Taking Enormous Dump," it would look just like Blount. LeCroy, his sugar daddy at JP Morgan, is a tall, bloodless, crisply dressed corporate operator with a shiny bald head and silver side patches — a cross between Skeletor and Michael Stipe.
The scheme they operated went something like this: LeCroy paid Blount millions of dollars, and Blount turned around and used the money to buy lavish gifts for his close friend Larry Langford, the now-convicted Birmingham mayor who at the time had just been elected president of the county commission. (At one point Blount took Langford on a shopping spree in New York, putting $3,290 worth of clothes from Zegna on his credit card.) Langford then signed off on one after another of the deadly swap deals being pushed by LeCroy. Every time the county refinanced its sewer debt, JP Morgan made millions of dollars in fees. Even more lucrative, each of the swap contracts contained clauses that mandated all sorts of penalties and payments in the event that something went wrong with the deal. In the mortgage business, this process is known as churning: You keep coming back over and over to refinance, and they keep "churning" you for more and more fees. "The transactions were complex, but the scheme was simple," said Robert Khuzami, director of enforcement for the SEC. "Senior JP Morgan bankers made unlawful payments to win business and earn fees."

Given the shitload of money to be made on the refinancing deals, JP Morgan was prepared to pay whatever it took to buy off officials in Jefferson County. In 2002, during a conversation recorded in Nixonian fashion by JP Morgan itself, LeCroy bragged that he had agreed to funnel payoff money to a pair of local companies to secure the votes of two county commissioners. "Look," the commissioners told him, "if we support the synthetic refunding, you guys have to take care of our two firms." LeCroy didn't blink. "Whatever you want," he told them. "If that's what you need, that's what you get. Just tell us how much."


Just tell us how much. That sums up the approach that JP Morgan took a few months later, when Langford announced that his good buddy Bill Blount would henceforth be involved with every financing transaction for Jefferson County. From JP Morgan's point of view, the decision to pay off Blount was a no-brainer. But the bank had one small problem: Goldman Sachs had already crawled up Blount's trouser leg, and the broker was advising Langford to pick them as Jefferson County's investment bank.

The solution they came up with was an extraordinary one: JP Morgan cut a separate deal with Goldman, paying the bank $3 million to fuck off, with Blount taking a $300,000 cut of the side deal. Suddenly Goldman was out and JP Morgan was sitting in Langford's lap. In another conversation caught on tape, LeCroy joked that the deal was his "philanthropic work," since the payoff amounted to a "charitable donation to Goldman Sachs" in return for "taking no risk."

That such a blatant violation of anti-trust laws took place and neither JP Morgan nor Goldman have been prosecuted for it is yet another mystery of the current financial crisis. "This is an open-and-shut case of anti-competitive behavior," says Taylor, the former regulator.


With Goldman out of the way, JP Morgan won the right to do a $1.1 billion bond offering — switching Jefferson County out of fixed-rate debt into variable-rate debt — and also did a corresponding $1.1 billion deal for a synthetic rate swap. The very same day the transaction was concluded, in May 2003, LeCroy had dinner with Langford and struck a deal to do yet another bond-and-swap transaction of roughly the same size. This time, the terms of the payoff were spelled out more explicitly. In a hilarious phone call between LeCroy and Douglas MacFaddin, another JP Morgan official, the two bankers groaned aloud about how much it was going to cost to satisfy Blount:

LeCroy: I said, "Commissioner Langford, I'll do that because that's your suggestion, but you gotta help us keep him under control. Because when you give that guy a hand, he takes your arm." You know?
MacFaddin: [Laughing] Yeah, you end up in the wood-chipper.
All told, JP Morgan ended up paying Blount nearly $3 million for "performing no known services," in the words of the SEC. In at least one of the deals, Blount made upward of 15 percent of JP Morgan's entire fee. When I ask Taylor what a legitimate consultant might earn in such a circumstance, he laughs. "What's a 'legitimate consultant' in a case like this? He made this money for doing jack shit."
As the tapes of LeCroy's calls show, even officials at JP Morgan were incredulous at the money being funneled to Blount. "How does he get 15 percent?" one associate at the bank asks LeCroy. "For doing what? For not messing with us?"
"Not messing with us," LeCroy agrees. "It's a lot of money, but in the end, it's worth it on a billion-dollar deal."

That's putting it mildly: The deals wound up being the largest swap agreements in JP Morgan's history. Making matters worse, the payoffs didn't even wind up costing the bank a dime. As the SEC explained in a statement on the scam, JP Morgan "passed on the cost of the unlawful payments by charging the county higher interest rates on the swap transactions." In other words, not only did the bank bribe local politicians to take the sucky deal, they got local taxpayers to pay for the bribes. And because Jefferson County had no idea what kind of deal it was getting on the swaps, JP Morgan could basically charge whatever it wanted. According to an analysis of the swap deals commissioned by the county in 2007, taxpayers had been overcharged at least $93 million on the transactions.

JP Morgan was far from alone in the scam: Virtually everyone doing business in Jefferson County was on the take. Four of the nation's top investment banks, the very cream of American finance, were involved in one way or another with payoffs to Blount in their scramble to do business with the county. In addition to JP Morgan and Goldman Sachs, Bear Stearns paid Langford's bagman $2.4 million, while Lehman Brothers got off cheap with a $35,000 "arranger's fee." At least a dozen of the county's contractors were also cashing in, along with many of the county commissioners. "If you go into the county courthouse," says Michael Morrison, a planner who works for the county, "there's a gallery of past commissioners on the wall. On the top row, every single one of 'em but two has been investigated, indicted or convicted. It's a joke."

The crazy thing is that such arrangements — where some local scoundrel gets a massive fee for doing nothing but greasing the wheels with elected officials — have been taking place all over the country. In Illinois, during the Upper Volta-esque era of Rod Blagojevich, a Republican political consultant named Robert Kjellander got 10 percent of the entire fee Bear Stearns earned doing a bond sale for the state pension fund. At the start of Obama's term, Bill Richardson's Cabinet appointment was derailed for a similar scheme when he was governor of New Mexico. Indeed, one reason that officials in Jefferson County didn't know that the swaps they were signing off on were shitty was because their adviser on the deals was a firm called CDR Financial Products, which is now accused of conspiring to overcharge dozens of cities in swap transactions. According to a federal antitrust lawsuit, CDR is basically a big-league version of Bill Blount — banks tossed money at the firm, which in turn advised local politicians that they were getting a good deal. "It was basically, you pay CDR, and CDR helps push the deal through," says Taylor.

In the end, though, all this bribery and graft was just the table-setter for the real disaster. In taking all those bribes and signing on to all those swaps, the commissioners in Jefferson County had ­basically started the clock on a financial time bomb that, sooner or later, had to explode. By continually refinancing to keep the county in its giant McMansion, the commission had managed to push into the future that inevitable day when the real bill would arrive in the mail. But that's where the mortgage analogy ends — because in one key area, a swap deal differs from a home mortgage. Imagine a mortgage that you have to keep on paying even after you sell your house. That's basically how a swap deal works. And Jefferson County had done 23 of them. At one point, they had more outstanding swaps than New York City.

Judgment Day was coming — just like it was for the Delaware River Port Authority, the Pennsylvania school system, the cities of Detroit, Chicago, Oakland and Los Angeles, the states of Connecticut and Mississippi, the city of Milan and nearly 500 other municipalities in Italy, the country of Greece, and God knows who else. All of these places are now reeling under the weight of similarly elaborate and ill-advised swaps — and if what happened in Jefferson County is any guide, hoo boy. Because when the shit hit the fan in Birmingham, it really hit the fan.


For Jefferson County, the deal blew up in early 2008, when a dizzying array of penalties and other fine-print poison worked into the swap contracts started to kick in. The trouble began with the housing crash, which took down the insurance companies that had underwritten the county's bonds. That rendered the county's insurance worthless, triggering clauses in its swap contracts that required it to pay off more than $800 million of its debt in only four years, rather than 40. That, in turn, scared off private lenders, who were no longer ­interested in bidding on the county's bonds. The banks were forced to make up the difference — a service for which they charged enormous penalties. It was as if the county had missed a payment on its credit card and woke up the next morning to find its annual percentage rate jacked up to a million percent. Between 2008 and 2009, the annual payment on Jefferson County's debt jumped from $53 million to a whopping $636 million.
It gets worse. Remember the swap deal that Jefferson County did with JP Morgan, how the variable rates it got from the bank were supposed to match those it owed its bondholders? Well, they didn't. Most of the payments the county was receiving from JP Morgan were based on one set of interest rates (the London Interbank Exchange Rate), while the payments it owed to its bondholders followed a different set of rates (a municipal-bond index). Jefferson County was suddenly getting far less from JP Morgan, and owing tons more to bondholders. In other words, the bank and Bill Blount made tens of millions of dollars selling deals to local politicians that were not only completely defective, but blew the entire county to smithereens.
And here's the kicker. Last year, when Jefferson County, staggered by the weight of its penalties, was unable to make its swap payments to JP Morgan, the bank canceled the deal. That triggered one-time "termination fees" of — yes, you read this right — $647 million. That was money the county would owe no matter what happened with the rest of its debt, even if bondholders decided to forgive and forget every dime the county had borrowed. It was like the herpes simplex of loans — debt that does not go away, ever, for as long as you live. On a sewer project that was originally supposed to cost $250 million, the county now owed a total of $1.28 billion just in interest and fees on the debt. Imagine paying $250,000 a year on a car you purchased for $50,000, and that's roughly where Jefferson County stood at the end of last year.
Last November, the SEC charged JP Morgan with fraud and canceled the $647 million in termination fees. The bank agreed to pay a $25 million fine and fork over $50 million to assist displaced workers in Jefferson County. So far, the county has managed to avoid bankruptcy, but the sewer fiasco had downgraded its credit rating, triggering payments on other outstanding loans and pushing Birmingham toward the status of an African debtor state. For the next generation, the county will be in a constant fight to collect enough taxes just to pay off its debt, which now totals $4,800 per resident.
The city of Birmingham was founded in 1871, at the dawn of the Southern industrial boom, for the express purpose of attracting Northern capital — it was even named after a famous British steel town to burnish its entrepreneurial cred. There's a gruesome irony in it now lying sacked and looted by financial vandals from the North. The destruction of Jefferson County reveals the basic battle plan of these modern barbarians, the way that banks like JP Morgan and Goldman Sachs have systematically set out to pillage towns and cities from Pittsburgh to Athens. These guys aren't number-crunching whizzes making smart investments; what they do is find suckers in some municipal-finance department, corner them in complex lose-lose deals and flay them alive. In a complete subversion of free-market principles, they take no risk, score deals based on political influence rather than competition, keep consumers in the dark — and walk away with big money. "It's not high finance," says Taylor, the former bond regulator. "It's low finance." And even if the regulators manage to catch up with them billions of dollars later, the banks just pay a small fine and move on to the next scam. This isn't capitalism. It's nomadic thievery.
[From Issue 1102 — April 15, 2010]
More by Matt Taibbi:

Monday, April 5, 2010

Porsche 918 Spyder Hybrid (concept)



(double click the image or the title to go to youtube and view in 16:9 aspect ratio.  i am looking for a blog template that allows an "HD" width video/image to fit in the prescribed posting area)

http://www.autoblog.com/2010/03/01/porsche-918-spyder-plug-in-hybrid-concept-gets-78-mpg-hits-62-m/

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Ronde van Vlaanderen - 94th Tour of Flanders




Cancellara drops Boonen with 20 km to go...the strongest of the strong men, for his first Tour of Flanders.

RESULTS

1 Fabian Cancellara (Swi) Saxo Bank 6:25:32
2 Tom Boonen (Bel) Quick Step 0:01:13
3 Philippe Gilbert (Bel) Omega Pharma-Lotto 0:02:10
4 Bjorn Leukemans (Ned) Vacansoleil 0:02:13
5 Tyler Farrar (USA) Garmin-Transitions
6 George Hincapie (USA) BMC



Saturday, April 3, 2010

Political Games


Steffy: Dodge, baby, dodge on drilling issue

By LOREN STEFFY Copyright 2010 Houston Chronicle

April 1, 2010, 10:49PM

My neck hurts.
I think I got a case of whiplash from listening to President Barack Obama's announcement on offshore oil and natural gas drilling. That's what I get for trying to look for logic in what passes for federal energy policy.
The headlines, of course, were that Obama was opening parts of the East Coast and eastern Gulf of Mexico to new drilling, but most of that is just a political dance to woo Republicans for a climate bill.
The real issue in the Obama policy is Alaska. The energy industry spent seven years persuading the Bush administration to open Bristol Bay, on the southern coast, and two regions in the north to new drilling.
Under Obama's plan, it would be closed again until at least 2017, just another zig in our ever zagging plan for energy development.
Houston-based ConocoPhillips has invested more than $500 million in its Chukchi Sea leases in the north during the past two years and is scheduled to drill its first well in 2012. It will be allowed to proceed under the new plan, as will a project Shell Oil Co. has in the region.
ConocoPhillips' investment, though, shows the level of capital and long lead times required for these projects. It's not the sort of money most companies are willing to gamble on wishy-washy government policies.
While shutting down new areas of Alaska, Obama plans to open new areas of the Gulf. Drilling will be limited to at least 125 miles off the shore of Florida.
Don't expect companies to be flooding into the area and setting up platforms.
Offshore drilling is a migration, from shallow waters to deep. The farther from shore the drilling occurs, the more expensive it becomes.
BP's massive Thunder Horse platform, for example, is 175 miles from New Orleans, but BP didn't just plunk it down in the middle of the Gulf. Fly out to Thunder Horse and you pass several generations of earlier rigs, each wave of development pushing farther from shore than the last.
What's more, unlike Louisiana and Texas, the East Coast has no drilling infrastructure to speak of — no storage facilities, pipelines, hubs, equipment yards, or transportation system for shuttling workers to and from the rigs.
Developing that will take years, and in the meantime, drilling costs will be astronomical.
BP spent $1 billion building the 50,000-ton Thunder Horse, and Shell spent about $3 billion on its Perdido platform.
Obama may score some political points with opponents. The oil industry was issuing cautious statements this week, calling the announcement “meaningful” and praising the job creation that will ensue.
But no jobs are going to be created until the money issues are settled, and in that, Obama has opened a 42-gallon drum of worms. If a companies finds oil or natural gas, who gets the royalties? The state or the feds?
With both levels of government hungry for revenue, the royalty fight could get ugly. After a bruising battle over similar issues in 2006, some federal lawmakers vowed to cut states out of the royalty picture in the future.
Meanwhile, the states affected by the plan — from Maryland to Florida — are already licking their fiscal chops. Virginia just last month enacted legislation for distributing energy royalties.
Billed as a compromise, Obama's policy is really an expensive trade-off, shutting down access to fields of known reserves in favor of some very expensive question marks.
It may be that, in time, the country will benefit from the new policy, that companies will be willing to place big bets in the newly opened areas, but that's likely only with a significant rise in oil prices that would make them worth the risk.
Obama was right about one thing: we need “to harness traditional sources of fuel even as we ramp up production of new sources.” Unfortunately, the plan he outlined this week doesn't do that.
All it does is make my neck hurt.
Loren Steffy is the Chronicle's business columnist. His commentary appears Sundays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Contact him at loren.steffy@chron.com. His blog is at http://blogs.chron.com/lorensteffy/.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Guitar Men

In keeping with tonights theme.

Friday Night Guitar?

Three Great Guitar Players...photos by Jim Marshall

Jimi -




The iconic image of the 1967 Monterey Pop Festival—Jimi Hendrix squirts lighter fluid on his burning Stratocaster. 




"Another shot of Jimi during the same soundcheck at Monterey Pop. Jimi hit a note on his guitar, and the way it made him feel is all over his face. I was three feet from him and shot this with a Leica M2, with a medium-wide angle lens. I don't know how many people really knew Jimi — he had an arrogance, sex appeal, and more talent and excitement than any one man has a right to." — Jim Marshall





“Jimi was a superstar by now. He wrote his name down forever at Monterey, that performance made him in the States. At his Winterland show in ’68 I knew him enough then that I could go right up onstage and shoot. He said I could do whatever I want. I was using a 24mm 2.8 lens, probably no further than four feet away. He was oblivious to me, like I didn’t exist. It was fucking loud, probably one of the reasons why I’m deaf now. I shot Jimi quite a few times after that, the last time at the Isle of Wight just two weeks before he died. He was burned out from being Jimi Hendrix. It was horrible, the light was shitty, there was a milliion photographers there, the sound was terrible, I think I have one good shot. He was a lovely man, I went to his funeral with Miles.”
—Jim Marshall



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Duane Allman -

The available Videos suck - try this link Duane on the SLIDE guitar, Greg signing.  They opened their concerts with Stateboro Blues...sweet....

http://www.mp3-find.com/download.php?mp3=3E2Oox0jDcY&artist=The+Allman+Brothers+Band&song=Statesboro+Blues







“This shot of the Allman Brothers Band was taken in Macon, Georgia, in 1971 for the cover of At Fillmore East. From the left, Jai Johanny Johanson, Duane, Gregg, Dickey Betts, Berry Oakley, and Butch Trucks. Now, the interesting part of this story is that I hear there are guided tours of the Lower East Side in New York City that supposedly visit the spot where this shot was taken. None of the pictures on the At Fillmore East album or CD packages were taken at the Fillmore East. Right before we did the shot in Macon, I stenciled "The Allman Brotheres Band at Fillmore East" on one of the cases. For the album concept, I received a platinum record from the Allman Brothers' current manager.”
—Jim Marshall



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Stevie Ray (playing a Jimi classic) -





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